A Llama in Europe
by Lili and RayRay
Summary: Watch out, all you European nations! Peru gets booted to Europe by Chile and spends a few weeks annoying the other countries at their houses. Oh, and did I mention he brought his pet llama along? Rated T for mild swearing


**This fic contains major OC involvement. It's my version of Peru, that adorable little [SQUEAL]. Ahem. Anyway, Chile finally got pissed enough at him to ship him to Europe and let everyone's favorite Hetalia characters deal with him. I'm starting with the arrival scene in Spain because Peru was founded by the Spanish, after all. And so, here you go~**

* * *

Romano was rudely awakened at four in the morning by a very hyper Spain. "Ow, what the hell do you want?" he groaned as the Spaniard poked him repeatedly, giggling. "Leave me alone, I'm not having sex with you, I don't care how horny you are…"

"Lovi, Lovi, get up! We have to go right now! Come on!" A pair of hands closed around his shoulders. Romano groaned even louder when Spain yanked him to a sitting position and attempted to dress him. "Hey, don't tell me you forgot! Today's the day Huayna comes here! Hey, hey, wake up! Wake up, Lovi!" Romano went limp. He considered the situation for a moment, then let the Italian fall back onto the bed and lifted himself over top of him.

A second later, Romano let out a bloodcurdling scream and sat bolt upright. "YOU BASTARD! MY VITAL REGIONS!" He pushed Spain off and clutched at his groin, which had suffered the crushing weight of a very heavy Spaniard and his firm ass. "What the hell are you doing? Go away!" He dove back under the covers.

"Aww, but Lovi~~~!" Spain protested. "We have to go pick him up from the airport!"

Romano's eyes snapped open. What. The. _Fuck_. "Are you kidding me? He got dumped here at this hour? Why didn't he choose a better time, damn it? And anyways, why don't you go by yourself?"

"But I can't! You get a better view in the front seat, but kids are too short to sit there, so I'll just have Huayna sit in your lap and it'll solve everything! How about it?" He beamed.

Romano winced at the thought of sitting in a car before the crack of dawn with a goat-smelling little brat in his lap. "Ugh, no thanks. How about I drive instead?"

"But you're so sleepy! You'll crash us into a tree or something…"

"I'll be awake by the time we get there. Really."

An hour later, though, he was still trying hard not to nod off as they stood in wait for their fellow nation. Spain clucked his tongue chidingly when Romano keeled over and bumped into a chubby Indian with an Einstein-style aureole of white hair. "Looks like I'll be driving after all."

"Mmmhnmhmmmmchiginnnnmmm…"

Spain's eyes lit up. He pointed at a small, coffee-skinned boy coming from the baggage claim area. "Look! Look! There he is!" He waved. "Huayna! Over here!"

Following the boy was a blond in a neatly-pressed suit, pushing a cart with two suitcases. When he saw Spain, the boy turned to the man behind him. "There's my _Papá_. I can handle things from here; thanks for your help."

Spain smiled at the man gratefully. "_Gracias!_"

Romano raised an eyebrow. "You never told me you had other kids in the New World," he said, a little sullenly.

"Ahahaha, are you jealous?" Spain smirked.

"N-no!" Romano sputtered. "Wh-why would I be, bastard?"

Spain laughed as he ruffled his hair affectionately. "They're all adopted," he said reassuringly. "Guadalupe, Yamai, Ayelén… even that lovable Juan you keep fighting with. So quit gnawing your nails off over the idea of me knocking up some lovely Inca beauty, eh?" He pulled Romano's fingertips from his mouth. Then, turning to the boy, he said, "Huayna, this is Romano, the southern part of Italy."

"Pleased to meet you," the boy said with a shy smile. He extended a hand. "I'm Peru. My human name is Huayna Capac."

Romano took it. "Lovino Vargas."

Peru looked about twelve years old, with a round childish face and shiny black hair tied in a stubby ponytail with a length of string. A pair of golden discs hung from his ears. His warm, chocolate-brown eyes were capped by thin, sharp eyebrows that were partially hidden by his bangs, giving him the impression of constantly having a slightly bemused expression. He was dressed in a mixture of clothing styles; a colorful woolen poncho extended to mid-thigh, covering his crisp white shirt. The top of his pinstriped tie peeked out at the collar. Despite the weather, Peru left his shins exposed between his shorts and thick felt boots. In his hands he held a woolen hat, which he tucked into his pocket when Spain started fussing over him.

"Huayna, you've gotten so big since the last time I saw you!" The Spaniard gave him a hug, which he reluctantly returned. "Come now, don't be so shy! _Papá_'s here for you~~~" He picked him up, ignoring his whines of protest. Romano couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy as Spain spun around with Peru in his arms, giggling idiotically while the boy tried to squirm free. He wished the tomato bastard would p-pick _him_ up ag-again and d-d-do the s-same thi—Ch-chigi! Blasphemy! What kind of weird thoughts were running through his mind? He shook his head to clear it, then grabbed the suitcases and shepherded Spain to the parking lot. Peru eventually stopped struggling and lay pouting with his head resting on Spain's shoulder. From time to time the man would make a comment and stroke his hair lovingly, evoking more blushing and protesting. When they reached the car, Spain eased Peru to the ground and opened the door for him. "Huayna, you don't mind sitting on Lovi's lap, do you?" he said, burying his fingers in the Peruvian's hair again.

"Wh-what the fuck, you were serious about that?" Romano sputtered. "Hell no! I'm not acting as some kid's booster seat! Screw you!"

"Lovi, we have to be nice to our guests…"

* * *

"Señor Romano, I'm really sorry about this…"

"Meh. Whatever," Romano huffed. H-he was only doing it so he could g-get home earlier and sleep, damn it! I-it wasn't for Spain or Peru or anyone! Beside him, Spain laughed. "Your face is red, Lovi~~~"

"Ch-chigi! Is not! A-and where are you looking, you bastard? Turn back to the road, damn it!" Romano unfolded a road map and held it up like a curtain. "Stupid jerk…"

"Ahahahaha! Lovi, I can't see the side of the road with you holding that up."

"D-damn you!"

By the time they reached Spain's house, Romano was ready to _lynch_ the bastard for all the passes he'd made at him during the trip. Peru, fortunately, had fallen asleep before the really suggestive flirting took place. Spain squealed at the sight of the boy sleeping peacefully in Romano's lap. "Look, look, Lovi, isn't he adorable?" he cooed as he picked Peru up, careful not to wake him. "It must be past midnight in Cuzco by now. Man, that's some killer jet lag he'll get… help me with the luggage, will you?" He smiled gratefully as Romano grudgingly trudged to the trunk.

He tucked the Peruvian into bed and carefully removed the earrings (they were clip-on). Peru stirred as Spain pulled off his tie and undid the top few buttons on his shirt. "S-Spain?" he mumbled blearily, cracking open an eye.

"We're home, Huayna," said Spain gently, untying his ponytail. "You must be tired; just rest for a while." He stroked the boy's hair soothingly.

"Where's Capac?"

"He'll be here tomorrow. It's tough work bringing an animal across the ocean, you know."

"Mm…" Peru snuggled against his pillow. "_Buenas noches_."

Spain chuckled. "It's morning already." But Peru had already gone back to sleep.

He closed the door of the guest bedroom and practically bounded up the stairs to his own room, where Romano had crawled back under the covers to try and regain the hours he'd lost. He smiled, then stripped off his jacket and jeans and jumped into bed beside him. "Lovi, Lovi, aren't you excited to have Peru over?" he chirped, hugging the Italian.

Romano groaned. "Go away. I'm still not having sex with you."

"Hey, hey, guess what?"

"I don't think I want to know."

"The llama arrives tomorrow!"

"…I _told_ you I didn't want to know." Romano facepalmed. "Whatever. Leave me alone so I can sleep." He turned his back to Spain.

"Aww, okay…" Spain got up and went downstairs to make himself breakfast, whistling. Today would be a good day, he could just feel it.

Several minutes later, the words finally sank in. Romano sat up. "The WHAT?"

* * *

**Yes, Romano. The llama. LLAMA.**

**Sorry if you find the symbol offensive; "Peru in Europe" just sounded kinda plain so I decided to use his llama friend to represent him. I'm still working out the order of the people whose houses he'll be staying at and it makes me feel like an airline person trying to figure out the shortest flight route. Not as fun as it sounds. **

**Thanks for reading guys. R&R~  
**


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